World Breastfeeding Week 2022

Feeding Ramona has always been a core part of our relationship. Even when I discovered that my powerful let-down was causing her discomfort or when cluster-feeding left me emotionally and physically broken and drained. Even at 2 in the morning, when I would swing my legs out of the bed, eyes closed, pull her into my lap and put my nipple in her mouth, exhausted; her little grunts and gentle stroking of my skin would draw my eyes open and we’d peer at each other, through the darkness. My husband would reach up and rub my back and the three of us would sit there in the dark, silent but connected. 

Now, it’s just the two of us, in a chair in her dimly lit room with music playing. She doesn’t grunt anymore but she giggles. She wraps her fingers in my jumper, plays with my hair and puts her feet in my mouth. She often jumps up, stands on my lap, grabs my hands and dances along to the music, not feeding at all until I threaten her with bed. It looks very different to those serene, 2am feeds but we’re still so connected. 

She’s 2 now so I know the time will come where she won’t want or need to feed from me anymore and that small time we have together will change again. But for now, I’ll continue to revel in our time alone and to share my body with her for as long as I can.